Friday, July 27, 2007

Major Dissapointment

Sorry for not updating my blog due to me having a big shock and also being very worry and depress and I completely forgotten about this, not to mention mD and also my scanlation group.

Well, I'm really depress this few days due to flunking again my flunked subject which now I have a last chance of taking it again. University is harsh, in some way.

Currently looking for alternatives and ways to get around that subject, also looking for accountants who are willing to give tutoring to me and a few of my friends who is also in the same situation as me.

I'm now really depress and confuse. I cannot accept the fact that I flunk it since I put in so much effort and time and still can't get through. May partly be me to be blame as I took 2 killing subjects this semester plus another subject, which maybe a burden indirectly towards me. I got shock when I got my result.

Feeling very guilty towards my parents, especially my dad since he has high hopes on me and I let him down. I'm not sure if he reads my blog but if you do, I'm really sorry dad. I know you want the best for me but I'm really really sorry for letting you down.

So, now its striving for the final and last time, before I change my course to either Multimedia Business Marketing, where the subject is optional and I may graduate faster due to the fact I took most of the 2nd year subject already. Or, going for Multimedia Software Development as my uncle and parents say I am good with IT stuff. I'm still very uncertain.

I would like to thank my uncle in KL, who talk me through stuff and I miss him very much. ANd my uncles here in Kuching who tried to look for friends who can help me. And my loving parents who understand what I am going through, partly though as I had to explain 80% of what happened, and no forgetting my friends from SAMS and my old friends who encourage me and tried to cheer me up. And also my fellow lecturers who are willing to explain to me tonnes of my enquires and also the course co-ordinator who replyed my e-mail thought they aren't in campus. And my aunt's sister who tried to help clarify everything.

Failing once doesn't mean you will be a total failure, that I agree but with the fact that Swinbune kicks out students after a 3rd trial, it really destroy my will to study.

Oh well, no use thinking of sucidial thoughts. Waste of my life and my parents care and love. Maybe I'll go open up a business and who knows, I may make it big. Cause no all big successful people are holding a degree status. That is a relieve but.....working world demands it. Seems I found out life is so much more harsher that I though it would be and from my experience.


ToMCaT said...

Well, Intel... I understand what's your problem, and how you feel right now. As a friend, I can only advice you to try once more again. What we have said, try until the end, never give up before the end.

Hmm... If you really very interested in the course, and want to be a professional at that, please, do not give up easily. Because that's your dream... I know that will not be easy to make decision, because you are going to kick out by Swinburne if you have fail once more at that course.

In the other way, if you are not so interested with it, and is forced by someone to study that, STOP IT! Why? Actually, it will killing you if you continue again, although you have pass this time.

Anyway, friends? Or dreams?
Is your choice... I can't help you... I can only support you here... Wish you, GOOD LUCK.

Intel_Pentium said...

I choose this course cause I love it but seems I really hit a Mount Everest here, or worst. And I'm like a climber without equipment.